…and it’s not love.”
So says an email I received from the lady who runs ISS, where I sent one of my crazier boys today to take his test and not distract his peers. Valentine’s Day surrounded by 132 fifteen- and sixteen-year-olds is something Dante should have included in his Inferno. For example, today I experienced a disproportionate amount of:
- Angry students
- Sugared up students
- Girls getting busted for carrying monstrous teddy bears (pillows and blankets aren’t in dress code; apparently, neither are giant stuffed animals)
- Girls ask to keep their large vases of roses in my room; I’m getting high off the smell of my desk.
- Kids throwing Twizzlers across the room during our test.
- Kids drinking out of their contraband sodas with aforementioned Twizzlers.
- Two of my girls (my cup game players) showed up during my lunchtime tutorial in obscenely exaggerated makeup and batches of silk flowers to demand, “Make me your Valentine!” “No, I want to be your Valentine!” while a third member of the posse filmed that on her cell phone.
- One of my boys who is usually very respectful kept talking after the bell and when I told him off he threw his hands in the air, huffed like a girl, and said, “Jesus Christ!” A few minutes later another kid interjected the same thing. Now, I realize this is public school, but I don’t appreciate kids yelling that, especially as Lent just started. So I told them to knock it off; it made me uncomfortable.
- Girls telling me how much they hate Valentine’s Day.
- Guys bragging about how much they spent on their girls for Valentine’s Day.
I think year I might take off Valentine’s Day. Very, very weird things are happening at the high school…