Being a mom is super fun, if exhausting. This is a shock to no one, of course. People ask me how it’s going, but the funny thing about the first few weeks – especially when he was born three weeks’ early – is that each day is different. If something happens two days in a row I consider it a pattern; three days in a row and it’s a routine. This is a “typical” schedule for Spartacus this week.
12:30 AM Wake up to eat. Diaper change.
1:15 AM Go back to sleep.
3:00 AM Wake up to eat. Diaper change. Momma pumps extra, during which Spartacus poops again. While changing the second diaper, he phantom pees somehow and soaks jammies. Costume change.
4:15 AM Go back to sleep.
5:00 AM Daddy’s alarm goes off; Momma puts Spartacus on Daddy’s chest to cuddle before he gets up and goes to work. Spartacus spits up on Daddy. Returned to bassinet.
5:30 AM Eat. Move from bassinet to big bed to snuggle with Momma.
7:45 AM Daddy comes home to shower and change; diaper change. Costume change.
8:00 AM Eat.
8:15 AM Diaper change.
8:20-10 AM Nap.
10:00 AM Eat. Diaper change.
10:30-10:45 AM Make concerned faces at the ceiling fan.
10:45-10:55 AM Tummy time. Make concerned faces at the dog.
11:00 AM Diaper change. Nap.
11:30 AM Eat. While eating, poo spectacularly. Blow Momma away with waft of inexplicably stinky poo. Diaper change.
12:00 PM-2:30 PM Nap. Momma naps too.
2:30 PM Eat. Diaper change.
3:00 PM-4:00 PM Be extra cute. Reflexively smile at everyone who holds him. Coo. Get kisses from the dog.
4:00 PM-5:15 PM Nap
5:30 PM Daddy gets home. Cuddle with Daddy. Fart loudly, convincing Daddy it’s a poopy diaper. Daddy changes diaper. Pee on Daddy. (Poor Daddy)
6:00 PM-10:00 PM Nap, despite our best efforts to keep him awake so he isn’t awake all night.
10:00 PM Wake up to eat. Diaper change, put on jammies. Stay wide awake until midnight. Repeat.