Yesterday my students tested AGAIN – World History. I found out crocheting was not allowed when a teacher is “actively monitoring” a state test, so I spent three hours carefully timing out 30-minute crazy breaks with my assistant monitor, so there was someone pacing between the stressed out children at all times.
It’s officially Teacher Appreciation Week, so our awesome office staff has kept the mailroom stocked with food and drink. Yesterday it was coffee, trays of pigs in a blanket, and tiny 4-ounce cartons of orange and apple juice. With all my testing breaks running to the mailroom, I had so much sugar and meat and caffeine coursing through my system I was getting loopy. When the AC kicked on in the gym after hour 2 of testing, I was fascinated by the hissing sound – it reminded me of all the discussions we’ve had in class about the gas chambers at the concentration camps, and I had this weird fantasy going through my head that the state first destroyed the mind by testing, then spit sleeping gas into the gym to prove some weird point. My sugar-addled brain somehow managed to convince my body that scaling the bleachers and yelling, “We’re being gassed!” was NOT the best “active monitoring” decision, but I’m convinced there is a special circle of hell for the really naughty people that requires them to proctor state standardized tests for eternity.
I am completely serious, this is what I thought about while proctoring the state test. It makes me wonder what went on in my teachers’ heads all the time I tested in high school…
Kaelyn King says
🙂 I don't think I could ever proctor a test. Kudos to you!